Right, got to write a profile for the website. Got to write about myself. Should be easy…
Ha ha, look at the pigeon on the bird table.
No, stop it. Come on, concentrate. I’ve been writing for almost 20 years, this should be easy.
Well, not 20 years non-stop, obviously. That would be daft. I’ve had meal breaks. And sleep.
Oooh, meal breaks. Must be time for breakfast. Back in a sec.
Whoever had the idea of putting bits of chocolate in bite-sized weetamathingies is a genius.
Right, where was I?
Ahh, yes, writing about myself. Less fun than it sounds, but needs doing.
Oh would you look at that – my cup’s empty. If I could train my cat to operate a tea pot I’d be a millionaire.
Hang fire. Don’t go away.
Where would we be without tea, eh? Wandering about like zombies, that’s where.
Anyway, right, where we at…
Nope, this profile hasn’t written itself in my absence. Damn.
Honestly, why is this so tricky? I’ve written for newspapers and magazines, I’ve interviewed rock stars and politicians, this should be a piece of…
…oh dear, the cat’s trying to catch a squirrel. This can’t end well.
Nope, better intervene.
Might as well get another cuppa on my way through.
Dum de dum de dum de dum.
Ha ha, that almost sounds like the Archers theme tune. Well, OK, not quite, but it could. If you squint a bit.
Stop it. Profile. Write it. Come on.
Great, now the cat wants in.
It’s so much easier (well, for the most part) writing about other people. That’s why I do it, I guess. Other people’s stories are fascinating, and hopefully inspiring. I’d much rather write about someone else, tell their story.
Bit like a photographer, hiding behind the lens. Only I’m hiding behind a pen. Well, keyboard, but you get my point. Not that I like having my picture taken either, as it goes.